How about this Lila? Ain't she a pearl? It's a cinch that this year she'll be higher up in the McKinney than anyone in this neck of the woods and she'll have done it without even hitting Route 66.
New York used to be the Mecca of bridge. Now it's not clear, but although it wouldn't be honorable for me to tell you where, it still hosts the toughest rubber bridge game in the world.
The most frequent knocks of this column are that a) it's too repetitious and redundant, too: Not so, not at all, no way, no how; b) it's too `in'. I checked that with Esther and Michael and they said "No problem"; c) It's too anti-systems and conventions. It's not the gadget that this C.O. is against, but some of the people who use them. When these tools are put into action by the likes of Stewart & Weinstein, they're like high-tech scalpel in a surgeon's hands. When lesser lights put them into play they serve as crutches; and we all know who needs those, don't we? One famous internationalist said that "The less judgment you have, the more conventions you need, and if you have no judgment at all, Precision's the thing."
Not since Culbertson has bridge been a spectator activity. The `record' attendance at a Vugraph or Bridgerama session is under 500-and that's non -paying voyeurs! At some Florida regionals where thereีs a $1 kibitzer fee, it's a minor miracle if, at the end of the week they have collected $100. So, when we are told that we are now part of the Olympics, it's prema ture to act as if El Exigente approved of the coffee, have dancing in the streets and have the fireworks go off all over the place. What people want to do is play. Period.
No Good Deed Ever Goes Unpunished Department: The Board's loyalty to the Vista during its troubles has been rewarded by a hike in rates. This might be a blessing in disguise as we are playing our next tournament at the well-located Crown Plaza.
Judi Radin resigned from the USA I team for the Venice Cup because of `personal reasons concerning the site'. Good for you, Judi. She was replaced by Kerri Sanborn in a two-for-one deal with Steve Sanborn agreeing to become NPC.
You be the judge: the so-called Venice Cup B team (those who were second in the Trials) have no kick coming. They knew the Conditions of Contest which only provided funds for the expenses of one team (the winners of the Team Trials). That said, if the League decided to send two teams instead of one, wouldn't it have been better to pick up the tab for them, instead of for some muckamucks whose main function is to act important.
It does seem that one of these VIP's might have faxed timely World Championship results to the ACBL or to the Internet. If a little country like Holland could do it, why not us, since apart from any other considerations we did send four whole teams over there.
It could be sheer coincidence that most of the fund raisers at clubs are scheduled for sessions that would otherwise have very poor attendance. (Just observing that `charity begins at home').
While we're on the subject of the green stuff, no one has yet been able to explain how a cool million and a half went to the dogs in Memphis. We realize that our new CEO was a little green on the job, but part of it did happen on his watch. The buck didn't stop there, it just kept on going. Every penny of it came from the membership.
One lady took this column seriously when it said that neither `sorting' nor `arranging' constituted proper Bridge terminology. After looking at her hand for a while and thinking, she proudly announced: "Rearranging".
Writing in your convention card, asking whose lead it is, or actually leading before the auction is ended all convey to your partner the notion that you've lost interest in the proceedings and that he'd better not take any further action. unfortunately, some club directors think it's ottomatic to ignore these transgressions. The only way to stop this kind of behavior is to penalize the louts. A gentle tap on their dirty fingers produces nothing but a clean spot.
The early starting times for Seniors at Nationals have been quite successful. Why not try it here?
The women in this neck of the woods can't complain. They run the Unit and most of the clubs in the area and do a very fine job.
After at least three decades of dedicated service to this Unit and District, Ira Zippert has called it quits and will no doubt now have more time to spend on the two things he loves so much-bridge and his sweet Lorraine.
Congratulations to Al Levy, this District's new representative on the Board of Directors.
Did the Conditions of Contest in both Bermuda Bowl and Venice Cup really preclude an all-US final? If so, thereีs no way this should have been agreed to.
Congrats to the so-called US Open B Team for just adding another World title to its collection.
By and large TDs and CDs (Tournament Directors and Club Directors) are a great bunch. But there are a few who, had they been around in 1912, would have no doubt been in charge of rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.
Before the advent of computers, TDs handled an average of 14 tables (one director for 14 tables). Now they might run two sections, as many as 16 tables. In the 16-table Cavendish Invitational they had four Directors and a shames (gofer) or two to move the boards.
Playing directors who try so hard to win make just one friend...partner.
In the olden days of the Mayfair, after its Wednesday night game, you could find people down the street in the cafeteria, going over hands on napkins. They became known as the `Napkin Brigade'. These types are still around and even get some of their stuff into the papers, whether true or not, prompting an occasional retraction.
It's remarkable that people who never, never, but never open 4-card majors give lessons in playing 4-3 fits.
When it concerns Negative Doubles or Drury, most knowledgeable opponents are aware when a failure to alert has occurred. If in these situations they deliberately shoot themselves in the foot (we can always ask for protection), they should get the same answer Blue Cross gives for self-inflicted injuries: NO COVERAGE.
John Kozero's letter to the Editor in the October Bulletin covered the previous item and related subjects extremely well. Hats off to Henry Francis for publishing it.
I had better stop now if I am ever going to win a ruling again. And I wish all a Happy and Healthy New Year.